hairbrained schemes

Dedicated.

Annual Halloween Party III is now over and we are almost recovered.

Our dog trainer told us that dogs yawn when they are annoyed. 

I'm certain Bella was just sleepy.

What could possibly be annoying about looking so damn dashing?

The table containing the body parts of one Mr. Hal O'Ween.

Disco Stu and his less than helpful Partner of the Round Table during the Mummy Wrap game.

More Disco Stu and the Waterless Apple Bob.

Our friends are dedicated.

How dedicated you ask?

Dedicated enough to go to the little grocery store up the hill and ask to borrow a shopping cart to round out a bag lady costume. 

And then fill said shopping cart up with assorted items and push it down the street and up a hill in order to make "an entrance".

That's dedication.

The bag lady in question and his Flashdance wanna-be friend.

Napoleon and Ugly Betty. 

More dedication.  Not only did Napoleon bring a binder with pictures of a Liger AND of his girlfriend, who is away modeling, but he also had a pocket full of tater tots and even ate one for us before realizing that maybe it was kinda gross that he just ate a tot  out of the pocket of a pair of jeans he picked up at Value Village.

Those are fake nails. 

And pantyhose.

And Beth's real name is Mark.

Dedication.

See how they stay in character?

Say it with me, now.

Dedication!

This is roughly around the time that things started to unravel and dedication took a backseat to shenanigans.

Bad Santa and his posse.

I think I dated that guy in 1984. 

And then I married the other one.

Spiraling a little more quickly now.

And with that I delete the more incriminating photos and bid you adieu.

The Good, The Bad, The Deep Fried.

Cool weather camping (I'm saying "cool" because I know some of my hardcore camping friends will scoff at my description of effin' cold, but believe you me, it was effin' cold) is something that I have resisted for the last 37 years.

Last weekend I cleaned and packed the trailer (which I haven't really wanted to set foot in since we half lived in it last June while our house was being finished) and off we toodled to Sugar Lake. 

Upon arrival I had a serious "stay away from the lake you only have 2 more pairs of pants" conversation with the boys.

Thirteen minutes later Lucas was standing in front of me soaking wet.

Surprised? 

I thought not. 

I wasn't either. 

Luckily, the most apt consequence for this act of stupidity  defiance  falling in the lake happened upon us quite by accident.

I had packed an extra pair of shoes for both boys, but sadly for Lucas, the pair that I packed for him consisted of a size 1 left Pokemon shoe and a size 3 left Spiderman shoe (he is currently a size 12). 

Accidental, but fitting. 

So Mr. Worried About How I Look had to schlep around the campsite in two very floppy left shoes.

And they were velcro closing, which is a whole other shameful thing according to the Book of Luke.

When the stars align, all is right with the world, and the punishment magically fits the crime, it makes me so happy to be a mom.

Other highlights of the weekend were, in no particular order:

Av crawling in bed with me in the morning after we'd dressed the kids and shoed them out the door and my sweet husband making and bringing us coffee.

Cheesies up the nose. 

I don't think I have to elaborate on that particular activity.

Deep fried turkey aka Paradise Found.

The best thing about camping other than the food?

The campfire.

The worst thing about camping other than the weight gain?

The campfire smell when you walk in the house after you get home.

The scavenger hunt I printed off the computer as Gorgeous George was sitting in the truck, ready to go, mentally honking the horn at me. 

I thought it would buy the moms an hour of peace when the dads were out atv-ing.  I made a crucial error in judgement by telling the kids that if they couldn't find the item (I was talking mostly about the deer and lizard that were listed) that they could get creative and draw a picture of the item.

The kids (who are as competitive as their mothers) found that drawing was WAY quicker than actually hunting for and finding, so sadly the hunt was over in about 10 minutes.

When I hear people say they live in God's country, they are sorely mistaken.

Because this is it.