hairbrained schemes

skater boy

Okay, I know to stay true to my title from song theme, that should actually be Sk8r Boi, but I have a deep rooted hatred of all things spelled wrong just to be cool.

Gorgeous George tortures me with the "Westside Boyz" atv club he formed a couple of years ago. 

That is what I have to live with on a regular basis, my friends.  (and while wearing things like cut-offs no less, I'm a freakin' saint if you haven't already figured that out).

Now back to what this post is really about.

Now that the house is off the market (for today anyway) we (I) have decided to decorate the boys' rooms.

Jacob chose Star Wars which we are working on finding stuff for. 

We bought one of those nifty word wall vinyl quotey things from a friend and put it up under a shelf that houses all the "DON'T TOUCH UPON THREAT OF GREAT BODILY HARM THAT MEANS YOU LUCAS" Star Wars lego.

Coveted (mostly by me) at the moment:

And Lucas chose skateboarding/snowboarding/surfing (this child has decision making problems)

So in trying to stay within the budget that we've set for ourselves since February, I made this:

I made the picture part in PSE and the frame is a cupboard door that I spraypainted with aluminum (have you ever heard a British person say aluminum?  It's fun!  If you meet someone from there I highly suggest you try to trick them into saying it. I have a new friend from the UK and could listen to her talk all day long) and then roughed it up with sandpaper.

and this:

I was lucky enough to find a font that has all the skate brands and used a couple of background papers from my supertalented friend, Libby's, digital kits.

Naturally, nothing is up yet because I'm waiting to find him a new bed (and I'm an awesome procrastinator).

I will share photos when it all comes together. 

I'm thinking maybe September.

 

I only want to be with you...

I guess I should be thankful these people that I live with (and their little dog, too!) just want to be near me. 

Where: my craftroom

What: trying to "get away from it all"

Who: Gorgeous George & friend

Why: because I'm awesome (I can't think of any other reason because, frankly, we have many other more comfortable napping places in our house)

As you can see, Bella has always been a bit of a floozy.  

My friend, Dawn, says it's all learned in the home.

And with that, I will segue seamlessly into a page I did the other day....

I think Dawn may be right.

Thank God I'm a Country Boy

Dear Mom,

 (I will address this to you as I'm sure you're the only person who has the tenacity to keep checking my poor forgotten woeful little blog),

As you may know, I like to use song titles for my blog titles.

You may wonder why I chose this particular one, as a) you know, having given birth to me, that I am, indeed, a girl and b) what?

I chose it because it is the first thing in 2009 that I was simultaneously able to annoy my entire family with.

I have what I like to refer to as eclectic taste in music.

I have what my husband likes to call, pardon his french, shitty taste in music.

(coming from someone who feels filled with joy when listening to "bands" like Disturbed - swear to God - that is a indirect quote- I believe the direct quote was "Is it weird that music like that makes me feel overwhelmingly happy?" - I don't give his opinion on that subject a whole lot of thought.  Oh and answer? Yes. It's weird. You need help that you clearly will never seek which is why my IPOD will always beat yours to the plug in jack in my car.)

As usual, I digress...

back to me finding a fun way to annoy the rest of the people that live in my house.

Insert IPOD into dock

search for John Denver or something similar (which conversely fills my husband with, not joy, but rage. And that's a direct quote. Seriously. Need therapy much?)

Turn it Loud (just like the Headpins did in the 80's, which, by the way, is another kick ass tune I have in my file, that while it doesn't make GG fill with rage, does in fact, make him roll his eyes)

Break out in my best (which is frankly, not very good) running man.

Do a running commentary about how good I am at the running man, exaggerating words like AWESOME, RAD, SWEET and WICKED (this part of the act is done to annoy the boys, who are more visually stimulated than their father, which means I also have to yell WATCH ME every few seconds).

So, mother dearest, perhaps next time my father's solitaire clickingclickingclicking starts to get on your last nerve, unclench your jaw, turn on some music that he hates and bust out your best dance moves.

Works for me.

xoxo

YLD

.........................................................

PS Here's some stuff I did this week.

 

 

can't get enough of your love

So I guess I've hit the big times.

I got this thinly veiled threat in my email the other day:

 

"where's my blog?? I'm about to take you off of my favorites!! and you don't want that!!! wacka wacka!!!"

It was from a guy called "loverboy" who happens to look just like this hot mess below and happens to have access to my email account (among other things):

Handsome, no?

Wacka wacka is defined in part by the Urban Dictionary as:

expression used to refer to a sexual act, especially when you want to be ambiguous.

The other day the boys were sitting at the kitchen table and Jacob said something and followed it up with an impressive one eyebrow raise (which, by the way, is on my bucket list and I am practicing it as I type) and a "wacka wacka" out of the side of his mouth. 

He kind of paused and then asked, "what does that mean anyway?"

Lucas pipes up, "I'm not sure what it means, but dad always says it right before he pinches mom's bum".

So, there's your blog Gorgeous George.

Kisses,

YLW

Professionalism at the workplace

So Dawn and I threw the Life Simplified staff Christmas party Friday night.

We treated the staff (us) and their spouses to dinner at the Blind Angler in Peachland (if you haven't been, go.)

The highlight of the evening was their signature carrot cake (which they sautee in butter and then drizzle - liberally, actually, drizzle might be the wrong word for it, let's go with dump - it with this lemony bit of heaven in a sauce).

The low point was trying to get a good picture of the staff spouses and getting this:

And this:

And this:

(this is where I believe they realized that no one else would be taking their tops off, so they had to make do. 

And I wonder why my kids can't behave when the camera comes out. 

It's all learned in the home.)

Next year we might just keep it to staff.

The Pitter Patter of Little Feet.

Up and down the hallway last night at 3 am.

Of course, now that breastfeeding is done, I (choose to) sleep through most of the extracurricular activities the boys might dream up. 

Last night it was the poops.

(I will refer to it as that because the word diarrhea makes Gorgeous George fake gag, shake his head and walk away from whatever conversation I decided turn down that road, even though the fact that I had to look up the correct spelling before I typed it makes me want to pepper it through this entire post).

Poor Lucas.

Then after the indignity of the poops, I had the gall to force him to stay home from school. 

I had to bribe him with lego.com and the story of Ellie, the little girl in my fourth grade class who peed her pants. 

The poor girl had that attached to her all through high school.

You can't take any chances with the poops.

Well, enough about diarrhea (sorry GG, but you know, you should have seen that one coming).

I just finished up a supercool assignment for Simple Scrapbooks' May/June issue.  I had a tough time with it for some reason, usually, the pages they do flow, but this time was a struggle.  It might have been all the holiday hoopla looming over me, I don't know, but it's done.

Here are a few things I made last month, when Christmas seemed to be forever away and when I was sure by this time I would be sitting back, packages wrapped, enjoying a hot toddy, instead of knee deep in wrapping paper ends, only 1/2 my shopping done and cleaning up vomit and diarrhea (I can't stop.  It's a sickness.)

Advent calendar:

Another advent calendar (with the numbers on)

...and off...

Tomorrow night, we are taking the staff (and the hubbies) out for our

Life Simplified Christmas staff party.

Gorgeous George said he wasn't sure if he wanted to go because he heard the parties got pretty wild and that one time one of the owners took her top off. 

He wishes.

How Do I Love Thee?

Let me count (10) ways...

1. You hooked up that wireless interweb thingie so I can sit on my butt in one room and steal pictures from the computer downstairs and print them in another room.

All. Without. Getting. Up. 

And I know you know how much I like not having to get up to do stuff.

2. You have acquired a taste for things like avocado and feta cheese through sheer will.  I know this may be due to the fact that I will serve them anyway because I like them, but I appreciate the fact that I don't have to deal with two Lucas' (Luci?) at dinnertime.

3. You painted our whole house by yourself. I'm going to choose to believe it's partly because you know how much I loathe to paint and not only because you think I'm a totally inept painter. Plus you only got mad at me a little when I changed paint colours 8 times throughout this house.  (PS Yes, the three bedroom colours are different.  It is a subtle difference.)

4. You can sew.  And aren't embarrassed to admit it.

5. You build really cool stuff.  And fast.

6. These guys

(Sometimes this one actually counts against you. Like when younger boy does things like drop his gameboy in the toilet while using the toilet even though his mom had thought that could be a distinct possibility that playing/peeing at the same time would seem like a good idea to younger boy and made the "no-electronics-in-the-bathroom rule".  Or when older boy follows me around, joke book in hand reading non-stop and prefacing each joke with "moooom" to make sure I'm rapt with interest.  But mostly they're on the pro side)

7. You'll drive to DQ just to get me a blizzard at 9:30 at night (even though I have been complaining the week before about how fat I feel and how I'm totally going to start my diet right now and that's that.)

8.  Even though you do all the "outside stuff" you still help me with the vacuuming because you know how much I hate to vacuum.

9.  You read my blog and crack yourself up leaving comments under your clever pseudonym.  (You are not as funny as you think you are Gorgeous George).

10.  Synchronicity, baby.  Synchronicity.

Happy Anniversary, GG.  Love you!

Critical Instruction

So Gorgeous George and I were have a discussion (yes, that is discussion, as in when your parents have an argument and you wail and ask them to stop fighting and they say but sweetie we weren't fighting we were DISCUSSING) the other day about the proper way to distress our wood floors.

And I learned something.

Apparently, if you are doing something that you have done 3 times before and feel quite comfortable... nay, well-schooled at said task and someone stands over you and points out how you could be doing it better, that is not criticism (I know! I was as surprised as you must be) but "instruction".

I learned something else.

I don't like instruction.

I wonder if there are counsellors out there who specialize in couples therapy for people who have been living in their basement when they finish the rest of their house.

It might be worth looking in to.

We are getting close to moving upstairs. 

The floors are stained and are anxiously awaiting their minimum of three coats of verathane (that have 12 hours between each coat, you do the math), appliances come Friday and the rest of our stuff comes out of storage on Monday. 

My wise friend, Michelle, pointed out that the crankiness that has descended upon this household  basement might have something to do with the added anxiousness (anxiety?) of being able to see the end of this.

She is a smart cookie.

Hopefully I'll have pictures to share soon.

And hopefully, they won't include mug shots of Jason or I.

I'm dying to get scrapbooking again. It's like coming off drugs.

Here are some layouts that are "retired" from the SS site.

How to Get Out of Painting: 101

"I'll paint the pantry! 

(pause for effect)

It doesn't matter what it looks like."

(Now if this could only be adapted for vacuuming).

Colour My World

Yes, ladies and gents....

we have COLOUR!

This weird kid kept trying to barge in on all my photos. 

I wonder if it had anything to do with the tub of gummi worms found in the trailer left over from camping last year.

Yum.

That is the wainscotting that GG and I fought over.

I won.

Doesn't it look fabulous?

You have outdone yourself Gorgeous George.

There will definitely be something other than hotdogs for YOUR dinner tonight.

That is the dining area on the wall across from the 2 windows are french doors onto the deck.

The kitchen (which will be linen with a american walnut rub through) area.

I have to have red in every home we've built/reno'd.

I think this is my favourite red yet.

The people who bought our old house (aka our new neighbours) recently told Jason that they painted over the "purple" wall. 

Ahem.

That was Arroyo Red (thank you very much).

Sheesh.

But I digress...

Other weird kid who kept following me around trying to show me drawings and stuff.

Again, probably all hopped up on stale gummi worms.

GG's office and potentially the main colour in the great room/hallways.

Agree?  Disagree?

I'm unsure.

Another view of GG's office.

Our interim home (Jennifer STOP LAUGHING).

Stilty McGuillicuddy and his magic paintbush of doom.

quote: "Maybe this year for halloween I'LL be the Jolly Green Giant and Joel can be Little Sprout". (I definitely sensed an eff-u sneer in his voice in this comment. Maybe the height went to his head).

Speaking of Joel and Jason (not my favourite layout, but that photo is a whole lotta funny).